In Good Faith

Writing

Writing Prompt: Describe a memory or encounter in which you considered your faith, religion, spirituality — or lack of — for the first time

As a person with a chronic illness I have had many experiences when my faith has been lacking. I was diagnosed with an autoimmune liver disease at 19 years old, I was in my first year of college and I remember the doctor telling me I has a liver disease that (at the time) was common in women in their 60s), I was confused, sad, hurt and scared and the whole time I kept trying to figure out why… Why did this happen to me, What did I ever do to deserve this? My life was just starting and I was forced to live with a disease of someone 3 times my age. For someone who had always been a “good girl”; never drank, smoked, did drugs, got good grades, help care for her younger brothers it was shocking that God would do something like this to me.

Things progressively got worst, and I got more angry and continued to ask why? I felt like all the faith that I had was for nothing. What was the point of believing in God, what was the point in praying and doing the “right thing” when it all it got you was liver biopsies, drugs, and on top of a transplant list…

You don’t realize  until you wake up in ICU with someone else body part inside of you, how strong your faith is. Although there were times (and still are where my faith is lacking) I put my faith in my family my doctors and surgeons (and a whole list of medical professionals behind the scenes ) to care for me. I placed faith in myself that I was gonna fight now matter how hard it was. And I don’t think I would have been able to do any of those things had I not had faith in a higher power.

I think we all encounter times when you have a lack of faith…. it’s what’s makes us human.

 

Until Next Time

tyra signature

Copyright © 2015 – Random Acts of Snark – Paying it Forward –  All Rights Reserved
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2 thoughts on “In Good Faith

  1. I think no matter how strong a person’s faith is, when life seems to crumble, you doubt your faith and ask a BILLION “why’s”. It’s an important step on the journey of spirituality and bonding even closer with your beliefs- or breaking free from them altogether.

    Thank you for sharing this very frightening time in your life. Facing life and death so young… Very compelling. Must have been difficult to write about.

    Like

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