Writing Prompt:What’s your next, most pressing deadline? Are you excited, stressed, or ambivalent about it? What’s the first thing you’d like to do once you’re done with it?
There hasn’t been an pressing deadlines or appointments lately, oddly enough December has been an “easy month for me”. Health wise I’m feeling a bit uncertain about my upcoming oncologist appointment, but seriously every time I there I’m feeling stressed and uncertain. These days I wake up and go through the motions not sure what the day was, yesterday I thought yesterday was Tuesday, and was shocked to learn that it was not. So imagined my surprise when I realized Christmas was only days away. Like Thanksgiving, Christmas has always been just a time for celebrate and be thankful, but this year it feels me with a little bit of dread, I’m already thinking, “I got get dressed and drive over to my parents house early in the morning, I have to deal with stupid jokes that aren’t funny and listen forced to listen to Christmas music when I do want to (now let me just say that I enjoy Christmas music, I don’t think that it should simply be limited to just the holiday season, I often listen to it in the extreme heat to have “winter thoughts” to cool myself down) but this year I haven’t even listened to one song, put up one decoration… nothing.
I wonder if my feeling this way has something to do with the fact I didn’t go through the holiday motions… my holiday shopping was done before Thanksgiving, and gifts were wrapped soon after, I haven’t watched my favorite holiday themed movie “Love Actually”, or it could have something to do with me not feeling well and being super fatigued all the time, or the fact that I’m still trying to deal with the unexpected death of my cousin (due to an undiagnosed heart condition), it could be a lot of things. This year Christmas will be just another day. …maybe next year will be better…
Until Next Time….