What The F*ck? TOWIE – Ep. 8

It’s that time again…another round of foolishness and f*ckery from my favorite overly tan, overly inflated Brits. So for those  two people who actually read my TOWIE posts these are for you.. previous season 12 posts can be found here , here and here. Last episode included a break-up a fashion show with no fashions… the continuation of the Ferne vs. The Simms Family drama… and the girls still haven’t made up. This post as well as the previous post photos are courtesy of Holy Moly

Episode 8 “Who Wants To Go Polo?” 

Has Chloe lightened her hair again? I don’t like it… wonder if she had someone at her shop to do it? She and Elliot are looking at houses, when she declares, “this room is really wooden”… thanks for stating the obvious Chloe, I guess no one really mistakes her for being the smart Simms sibling. Elliot and Chloe have only been dating for a short time, this are still somewhat tumultuous with the family so why would they think that now would be  a good time to move together… I don’t see this ending well at all (I wonder how the children feel about this)

Bobby looking really upset (seems like he’s had a rough night) has come over to Gemma’ to discuss the argument at the fashion show with no fashions. Bobby’s feelings are still hurt and still doesn’t really understand why Gemma can’t pick a side and stick with it. I’ve mentioned this before but it’s extremely difficult  to be friends with both parties when they are going through a breakup, it’s nearly impossible to divide your loyalties equally, so I sort of feel bad for Gemma.

NAIL POLISH SIGHTING! Diags is a poor replacement for Grace; although he seems to be enjoying his pedicure with the girls.

ITV_t_Towiea071714_thumb[1]The guys are getting ready for a polo game. Arg is telling the guys that he’s still in the friend zone and he may very well be staying there for the duration, I for one and ready for him to move on, learn how to drive, and stopping laughing like a hyena. I honestly thought that Mario was gonna pop out of the dressing room, since they were at the tailors, but I guess he hasn’t been cleared to film yet… guess that’s what happens with  drug charges…

Ferne is gushing about Billie’s baby with Jess and Ricky, conversation quickly moved on to the Charlie/Ferne saga (of course it would … that’s the only thing she has going for her right now… and I’m every single season it’s something going on with those to, I don’t how a couple with so much drama manages to stay together) she admits that she wasn’t with Charlie at the time when she proposition Elliot, so besides the fact that that it got out and embarrassed her, she was free to be proposition anyone she wanted for a quick bathroom f*ck…

ITV_t_Towiej071714_thumb[1]Grace is looking spiffy with her new hair (notice that she didn’t go to Chloe’s; just sayin’) Grace has decided that she is sick of the crap between her and Georgia and Fran and if she has to she’s ready to go toe to toe with the girls…. I had a bad feeling… something is about to happen between them… this is certainly not over.

Brother and sister meet to discuss the drama that seems to have overtaken their family. Chloe decides that she doesn’t like nature, (and I have officially decided that I have had it with her… it’s time for to shut her trap and let Charlie deal with his relationship like a man… if it’’ ends badly it’s on him, she’s given him her opinion numerous times… now it’s time to make peITV_t_Towieb071714_thumb[3]ace and move on) so why meet in a garden (clearly she forgot that she’s on a “reality” show and production that the garden would be “dramatic”) Charlie is still really upset , he doesn’t care what people think about his relationship, he simply wants his sister to accept it and for Elliot to keep his damn mouth closed… sounds simple and doable…. until the next time Charlie seems Elliot and they are back at square one…. never ending drama on this show…

At polo “posh” British people are showing off their finest threads and plastic surgeries. Vas in all his fashion-forwardness is wearing the latest in cameo tracksuit shorts combo. They are talking shit about Danni because like me she doesn’t get Vas’ fashion and thinks is looks like vomit that has been sitting in the hot summer sun. . Vas thinks she’s scum and makes some ITV_t_Towied071714_thumb[1]other cutting remarks about Danni, apparently he tried to be sly and made a passive aggressive tweet about her not being fashionable enough to understand his show… she came back with… “please, I know fashion, I’m a fashion buyer bitch… so you and your homeless chic and go suck it!” (I’m totally paraphrasing here). Before I move on Chloe makes a bitchy comment about how Ferne and her are practically wearing the same dress… I could be clueless, but Jessica’s dress is more similar to Chloe’s dress than Ferne’s is.. guess she just needed to be petty and  say something.. Gemma is wearing the latest from her collection while she and Bobby are scoping out the eye candy on the polo field. and Bobby wants a bloke that can ride him all night long, thanks for the imagery Bob.. While everyone else is stopping the diverts. Lauren and Lewis are over at the bar talking and Lewis admits that he really likes Laruen, there is a lot of smiling and complementing each other.

Arg still feels the need to go down memory lane with Lydia, he’s still pathetically in love with her and it’s a little sad; he asks Lydia to be his date to Leah’s wedding in Spain, Lydia agrees to go and tells him, they she will go only if they can have separate rooms,. Is it me or does Tom, Fran and Diags look like they have been sitting in the sun for a bit too long, or they could have a good buzz… Tom reminds us that they have free booze…. so he’s proudly double fisting it. Fran feels like Grace has changed a little bit and Lewis is a little bitch, Diags looks on, seems upset because he forgot him sunglasses.The “New” Grace is having a little chat with the “Old” Georgia and pretty much says she’s not gonna talk about it.

I think this might be the first scene that Elliot and Gemma have had all season, now we know Gemma wouldn’t be Gemma is her nose wasn’t in other people’s business… and this polo game is no exception, since she’s been dealing with the Barry drama, she hasn’t had the time to say her peace about the Ferne vs. Simms Family drama, so she sits down with Elliot who seems to busy to listen because he’s primping, but she pretty much tells him that he’s given Ferne a lot of low blows and it’s time for them to end this feud once and for all. Elliot feels like if  Ferne can keep her mouth closed this situation wouldn’t be happening, Gemma is looking at him and slightly judging him and thinking he’s full of shit .

Back on the tired peoples couch Tom decides to go over to the “New” Grace and tries to get Grace come over to talk to Fran and Diags… instead of doing so. she once again trying to explain to Tom and he doesn’t really want to hear it he just wants to girls to make up.

Apparently there is a post polo after party  (of course there is … this is TOWIE, there’s a pretty much a party every episode) Lewis walks over to Tom and Diag’s and the conversation is stilted and awkward and Diags looks like he’s had enough of the shit; he tells Lewis that he is two-faced and bitchy by add fuel to the fire between the girl…Lewis counters that there is always drama between the girls, and there’s no denying that.

Arg is having a sit down with Elliot and I think Arg might be a little drunk, he seems a little mumbled mouthed to be. And they talk about the wedding and he tells Elliot that he’s invited Elliot and they do their man talk….

Gemma ,Bobby, Charlie and Ferne go out for post polo curry, and Butch!Bobby makes an appearance …looks a lot like Regular! Bobby to me. Gemma sticks her nose in the drama (rolls eyes). She’s saying the same thing that everyone else is saying, it’s time to let it go. Charlie ITV_t_Towies071714looks like he’s on the verge of tears.

Lockie and Danni realized that they are the only people from polo who haven’t changed…Danni is totally digging the Italian gangster look. Jasmine makes her required appearance and brings up the whole Vas/Jas/Paz situation….lol . Ricky thinks that there is something more going on than the whole Lydia and Arg situation, apparently Lydia feels like they are together sometimes, without the whole pesty sex thing… she admits that’s she’s not ruling out getting back together… which means next season they will be back together…

Fran and Georgia walk up to each other and Fran looks tired, guess being out in the sun does that to a person…Grace doesn’t feel like Fran has been a good friend… telling her that she bitches behind her back and she doesn’t trust Fran, she no longer considered Fran a friend anymore, the whole time Fran is utterly confused. According the Grace Fran is a hypocrite because she was sleeping with someone else when her and Diags got together, and this sets Fran off. Grace storms off and Fran calls her a “f*cking bitch”


The next episode should be lots’ of fun…. can’t wait. For those of you who are unable to see the current season of TOWIE in your area… season 12 is now on HULU, and they finally got a clue and decided to air this years Marbs special…

Until Next Time…

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