Tummy Tales

This week Sunshine’s Journey to 199  Team Blue came in at an awesome  26.2 pounds lost!!! Team Gold beat us by only .6lb this week! And to add on to the amazing news the groups collectively have lost an amazing HALF A TON in 7 weeks. Lives are changing  and waists are getting smaller every single day. It’s an amazing group of people I have aligned myself with and I couldn’t be prouder of each and every one of them.

*****
Being Fierce in my *new* Blue Sports Bra

What’s the saying? Every wrinkle has a story… well I don’t have any wrinkles right now (know on wood) but I think my stomach has a story…my stomach is the story of my survival.  After two liver transplants and other abdominal surgeries my stomach looks like a war torn country. After I had my first liver transplant in 1999 I would show my scar to anyone who asked. An inverted Y slightly darker than my normal complexion. It was a thing of beauty it was my badge of honor, “I survived a liver transplant and I’m awesome” For 9 years I carried that scar with pride, When I was told that I would need a second transplant my beautiful scar was the last thing on my mind was trying not to die in front of my mother. My team was amazing and my surgeon who did my previous surgery told me that he was going to use my previous scar as a guide so that it would appear that I only had one scar. Needless to say things didn’t turn out that way…when I was released from the hospital my incision began to open and I developed a serious infection and had to have my entire incision reopened and after my debridement was placed on a wound pump while my stomach closed naturally . Because of this my stomach now looks like a frown (okay to be honest I don’t know what the hell my stomach looks like…how about it has “sections”) 


I no longer show my stomach in pride, my beautiful scar is no more, and 3 years after my transplant I still look at my stomach in horror and disgust. I will never wear a bikini no matter how much weight I loss, I always wear loose shirts, I don’t want to bring any attention to my stomach. The one day I was watching Dr. Oz and the audience was filled with women of all shapes and sizes in sports bras talking about their hate relationships with thier stomach and it struck a cord with me, and in that moment I realized that I was not brave enough to sit in that audience I don’t like showing my boyfriend my stomach how in the hell could I get on national television and show America my “elephant man” stomach. 




I had to seriously think about what it was that bothered me, was it the fact that I was fat? Nope! Was it the scar? Maybe! But I realized it was about being vulnerable, I don’t know many people who like being vulnerable  in front of anyone . I got brave and went to Longevity, Inc and posted this

So I’m sitting here watching Dr. Oz and they are talking about bellies and belly fat. All these women are sitting in the audience with sports bra bearing their bellies. All shapes and sizes of women. And it occurred to me… bearing you belly is like bearing your soul! You don’t want to feel exposed and open, so like our bellies we cover it up. I find it interesting that just a few days ago we were talking about it, and I made the off handed comment that my stomach looks like a science experiment gone wrong. After two transplants (especially the last one) my stomach has been sliced and diced more than I would like and because my surgical wounds opened I had to allow my stomach to naturally close on it own… so the scar is huge and ugly. So me more than anyone else has reason to hide their belly.Many people have said that they feel a certain amount of freedom on this group, no judgement and acceptance is here. So why would it be difficult for me to show my belly. My belly is shows my battle scars of a person who’s gone to war and won the fit… so I should be proud of that.
So I propose movement…. SHOW YOUR BELLIES!! Take a picture of yourselves in your sports bra as your “BEFORE” so you can slowly see the changes in your body…
Not pretty, but it’s mine!

As of October 3, 2011 No one has posted a picture, so since I was the one who opened my mouth. I guess I gotta put out or shut up…. me and my grand ideas? What the hell was I thinking? And where was my common sense when I proposed this grand idea? So with great trepidation I am posting my picture

My stomach is not pretty, but it tells my story… And I’m okay with that!

(After looking at the picture I just realize I have stomach boobs….lol)

Thanks goes to my brother for braving the chunky butt and taking my pictures

I’m also wanna share my progression pics. Everything is the same. Shirt… Pants… even the Cat..
For those of you wondering Elmo has decided that he doesn’t want to lose weight… and holding steady  at 14 pounds!

254
270
So today was not the best day food wise, once again I went over my protein  which I’m thinking is the salmon that I’ve been having for dinner two nights in a row (it was sooo yummy). I also went over my fat and calories (by 237). But stayed in the zone when it came to carbs. I can do better tomorrow.
Totals 2340 109 89 115
Your Daily Goal 2103 289 70 79
Remaining -237 180 -19 -36
Calories Carbs Fat Protein

As always, when you know better you do better

 

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